chartharsis: (► my ppl who don't like DW gun)
See that icon?

That icon is my entire problem, right now, and at the same time, it is the best thing ever.

Because if you're new here: hi, my name is Ang and I am a Darkwing Duck fan. Not a fangirl, a fan (there is a rant about the difference which I will get to another day). This is the show that formed a lot of my sense of humor, tastes, et cetera: it's one of those childhood loves I will always come back around to, the one I have more feelings about than I probably should, that I've sunk more hours into watching, doodling from, and, yes, once upon a time, even writing hundreds of pages of crap fanfiction about. It's actually how I cut my writing teeth, and the first two characters in my current original world started out as side villains in said crap fanfiction, until I realized I liked them too much to leave them there once I started feeling confident enough to write my own things.

But I digress. Darkwing is the ONE character I would still even consider writing for online role-playing, because I love him so much, and because his voice is just so embedded in my mind and strung across my memories. I only ever played him once, and it didn't last because the game setting didn't fit: he was a duck amid way too many humans, and a little too silly for a setting that was getting more serious than it used to be.

So, of course, it figures that when I said, hoping the third time would be the charm, "Nope, I'm done with online RP" ... the perfect game setting appears. A brand new game, with players I don't know from Eve, and an activity level that might just be manageable.

I'm not even going to stress about it, not in the least. I'm not going to worry about what former gamemates will think of me dropping and then picking up just a few months after quitting, I'm not going to try to enable anyone else to come and play with me, or advertise the game... in fact, if Plurk weren't the mods' preferred method of communication, I wouldn't mention it there at all. Because this isn't about me saying "oh my gosh you guys look at this thing I wrote" anymore... and I have to admit, what made me quit RP was the constant stream of "look at my threads" that I'd get from people, when I didn't have the time to do as much, myself.

This is about me setting aside a little time when I can to hang out in my mind with a character I love, have some fun, and generally just crack myself up. I need a little of that in my life, and I don't need to have A Designated RP Partner or Group Of Players around me to do it. If it turns out I don't have the time, I'll bow out gracefully. But this is an opportunity that I have, and an exercise in being able to say to myself "You see that opportunity? That's a thing you want. Don't deny yourself just because you think other people won't approve".

So I'm doing it. It'll take me a while to write the application and actually do it properly, and my tags will probably be slow, and I will probably be a little overwhelmed by all the new names, but ... who knows? It might be a blast.

On the flip side, juggling work, home, and taking care of myself along with trying to give equal hobby time to art, writing, RP and pixelated dragon breeding might be stretching myself dangerously thin.

But for now? Let's get dangerous.

September 2014

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